Today has been one of those rough mom days. I’ve prayed, I’ve cried, I’ve made calls and I’ve prayed again. There are times that being a mom just brings me to the end of me. Ok, let’s be honest, that’s most days. But nothing strips me bare like the pain of a hurting child. Whether it’s friend rejection, belief of a lie, working through a difficult situation, disappointment, learning struggles or even physical differences, when our babies are hurting, we hurt. We naturally want to fix it. As a parent who loves Jesus, the struggles of watching a child operate outside of God’s best is even more heartbreaking. Bring on the guilt that satan so willingly desires to assign to me and I find myself crumpled at the feet of Jesus…again.
As I open my Bible and read stories about people doing great (or not so great) things, I stop to ponder their mommas. It’s so easy to isolate the story from the relationship of true life, but we all know that’s not reality.
*Eve walked with God and saw His face. How many tears did she cry when her beloved first born murdered his brother? And then she saw him be cursed and lost him to wandering as well.
*Noah’s wife had her family saved as the only living people on earth only to have her youngest disgrace the family. What a shock.
*Hagar bawled to God in the desert as she was told her son would ‘have the hand of everyone against him.’
*Sarah let Abraham take her promised one up a mountain to be sacrificed. Surely she made a scene.
*Hannah suffered through years of infertility, was accused of being drunk and then convinced her husband it’s ok to give him away.
*Mary was shunned for being an unwed mom and watched her son suffer rejection.
*Elizabeth’s son lived in the desert and ate locusts. What did her friends say about that?
*The mom of the blind guy had been blamed for 40 years for her son’s disability and was interrogated by the Pharisees.
*Zacchaeus’ mom surely got the looks when she brought her son to the play group because of his stature…and then he decides to work for the corrupt IRS. Way to honor the family there.
*Paul had parents that obviously brought him up in church. He won the Bible quiz and got into seminary. Then he decided to go be a mass murderer.
How many prayers were prayed? How many tears were shed? How many ‘whys’ were cried out? How often did they blame themselves?
I find comfort knowing that from the beginning of time God has written a real life story for a mom like me. The good, bad and the ugly that I read about all have a common thread of redemptive glory.
I’m not the hero, Jesus is.
Jesus will take every tear cried and bottle it up in a sacred place. All our inabilities are nothing compared to His ability. None of our storms will overwhelm the Lord. No disgrace can’t be covered by His grace and no promise will remain unfulfilled.
Think about those stories when God reached down in the middle of their meltdown, shame, rebellion or discouragement. Not everyone got all happy endings, but every single one got an audience with the Lord, and many of those kid’s have a profound legacy of God transforming their life.
May I find mercy and grace at His throne and extend the same to others today.
You keep track of all my sorrows, You have collected all my tears in your bottle.You have recorded each one in your book. Psalm 56:8
Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful. Hebrews 10:23
For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account. Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has ascended into heaven,Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin.Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. Hebrew 4:12-16
The Shadow of My Porch Swing
You will usually find me on my porch swing or trying to get there at least. Warm drink in hand and the best view in the world...4 boys digging a hole. Seriously tho, I enjoy the chance to sit and rest but mostly ponder the life that happens in between each of those sways of that swing. As the sun rises and sets, the shadow of that swing moves across my porch reminding me that Jesus is always shining on each moment. May you find hope and rest in Jesus here.
Partnering with YouVersion and The Bible App, The Shadow of My Porch Swing - 7 day devotional is now available in the Plans section of the Bible app. Click link above or search by title or 'God's Presence.'